Playing the Avoidance Dance

It was pretty vivid. But dont remember much now. Big arches, huge buildings... like a university. We were playing the avoidance dance, at least he was. I was the one playing Tag, it seemed! And it was leaving a very bad feeling in me.. my heart.

P.S. These few days away from him playing games with my mind I think. 

Find Me A Reason

I saw that I was with few members of N's family including her. She was telling me about her sister falling for a guy called, Shishir??? A apparently did not have the guts or inclination to tell him about her feelings. To N it was incomprehensible (as expected)! She said her family also wanted A to tell Shishir about it. Their horoscopes did not match. I asked who did the matching? And one of N's family members said, 'We. We thought of matching on our own if this was going to come up.' I woke up.


P.S. Few days back as I was talking to N over fb, I was wondering if A was married by now. Probably that stuck on in my mind somewhere. And all this thinking and rethinking about myself, trying to find reasons on my own probably brought up the inter-religion/horoscope thingy!

Blowing Hot & Cold

He was supposed to go out of town. I got a call from a female customer for him. She wanted him to join her for some event in Mumbai. As I was beginning to feel the pangs of jealousy, I got another call from another female customer who again wanted him to visit their site for some other event. I went on the look out for him even though I knew he must have left for the airport by now. But somehow, he hadn't gone. He was sleeping, perhaps taking a nap. I was concerned. I went up to him and touched his hand to feel for a fever if there was any. He woke up as I asked, 'Are you alright?' 'Ya was feeling tired. I guess its time to leave.' But he wouldnt go. Or he would go and come back. He delayed his going away for quite some time. And finally when he couldnt have delayed it any more, he left. I woke up then...

P.S. I think these days my dreams are all filled with him... Not just my dreams, my every waking hour. Its bad.. My insecurities have led to the jealousy factor of the dream, the sweetness in his eye to his staying back long after I thought all was gone and this blowing hot and cold that is going on has resulted in this ending to the dream. I am in a soup!